Damage Control

Posted on by kevinjandt

It has now been over three years since Grace Fellowship responded to the various blog articles I’ve written about them and the podcasts done through Apologetics Live that highlighted the abuses and distortions in their teaching. They responded using an unusual method. They created a fairly well-produced private video. It actually is a good strategy. They don’t open themselves up to scrutiny by someone like me, but they can send it to the appropriate people with questions about their ministry.

I have sought to proclaim the truth of what happened to us and many others during our time at GFC. For those who might be new, we spent nine years at the church under the “authority” of Mike Reid and the eldership of GFC. We came to see the abuses, domineering society, and cult behaviors of what parades itself as an orthodox Baptist, 1689, Reformed Church. I’ve written many articles on the topic, all available for scrutiny and criticism. I have nothing to hide. I also have the required two to three witnesses to bring the charges, followed by at least another hundred who would affirm my charges and concur that these things do occur.

Not everyone agrees with me, which is the point of this article, but first, I’ve noticed a new attempt at damage control by the GFC brain trust. I looked up the term damage control, and the best description is “measures taken to offset or minimize damage to reputation, credibility, or public image caused by a controversial act, remark, or revelation.”[1]

Having a good reputation is important. According to Paul, it is a qualification for the office of elder in a Christian Church. Moreover, he must be well thought of by outsiders, so that he may not fall into disgrace, into a snare of the devil (1 Tim. 3:7).

There are several interesting points regarding this verse. A man’s reputation in church leadership matters to people outside the church community. He is expected to have a good reputation. He should be a good neighbor to those who live near him. He should be well thought of by those who hear of him, and all this predicts how he will behave inside the church and in his private life. He should be an upright and a stable man.

I have had more than my fair share of conversations regarding Grace Fellowship’s leadership and its principal leader, Mike Reid. One would be hard-pressed to find glowing reviews of his character among the non-believing and church communities. His reputation does not meet the requirements listed above, and his reputation does, indeed, precede him. I’ve made this argument before, along with several other qualifications mandated by the Apostle Paul. Will anyone see it within the GFC community? Unlikely.

This brings me to the main point: if your reputation is known (Proverbs 20:11), and Mike Reid’s reputation is well-known, you should improve your reputation somehow. Recently, they came up with an idea to write an article titled “In Case You Googled Us,” a friend told me they were showing up at certain college campuses. People would Google them and then confront them over their wacky behavior. Others we’ve known of had even mentioned they did Google searches, and the negative press was overwhelming. The article is well-written in its form, but it is distorted and inaccurate. Given the writing style, it leads me to believe it was written by Tony Miano, and since Tony doesn’t know all the details of our history at GFC, I can understand how he has been influenced to believe what he wrote. I wrote a response to set the record straight on one significant error, which continues to be repeated, as if telling a lie more often will make it so.

As a side note, much of this could be avoided by cleaning up the mess they’ve created rather than trying to whitewash it. However, the issue is that they can’t backtrack on their mistakes. That would show weakness, and the pride of their sins would have to be crushed. That’s not possible for them to admit. They can’t possibly go back and acknowledge the pain and misery they’ve caused to so many people.

The last point in trying to perform damage control is to improve your Google Review scores. Today, no matter where you are going, you probably check the reviews. These reviews are generally helpful. Most people want to give a fair analysis of their experiences, whether it be a restaurant or a church.

Let’s take a restaurant, for example. If I go to a place and receive good food and good service, it doesn’t mean the food is always good, but if you see enough reviews that indicate the restaurant is good, you can expect it to be good in most cases. Your odds are reasonable; this is a decent restaurant.

If you went to a church and enjoyed the service, experienced friendly people, and what you thought was a good sermon, it is a snapshot in time. It might be a good church, but it doesn’t mean it is. You’ve been given a glimpse of an unrealistic reality. If the people were nice, that doesn’t mean the people are always nice. It also doesn’t mean they aren’t. What you need is more information. What if that great restaurant you love has a bunch of health code violations or gave a bunch of people food poisoning? These may not show up on the review, but if you knew someone from the health department or someone from the health department contacted you to inform you, that might help change your mind. 

A church review is different from a restaurant review. Churches mostly have the same people coming to them. GFC is a small church, so it doesn’t receive visitors that often. What happens when a new face comes into the building? Have you ever heard the term love-bombing? They put their best foot forward and go out of their way to welcome them, and they will probably be invited to lunch after the service so the pastor can ask them how they liked his sermon (no joke).

Can one or two visits be enough to get an accurate understanding of a place? Well, yes and no. When you see signs like love-bombing, you should be aware. It’s good to be friendly, but not too friendly. One way to bolster your rating is to have all the member of GFC write glowing reviews and that is what they have chosen to do. Every review on there is from members less two. .

Certainly, hospitality, friendliness, and open arms are part of what it means to be a church of the Lord Jesus Christ, but that does not mean anything more than being friendly and welcoming. You may get the same treatment at your neighborhood Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Friendliness is not an inoculation against error, authoritarianism, or dozens of other potentially damaging actions.

Lastly, if you want to improve your Google reviews, not only have all your members write really nice things about how great the church is but also remove any negative feedback. That is the strategy they have utilized. Drown out, ignore, or remove dissension, but no matter how hard you try to whitewash your reputation it has a nasty habit of following you wherever you go. The only positive reviews are from the indoctrinated, and if you read them, it will tell you a lot about what you might be in store for if you attended GFC. Lord, help them.

Sadly, GFC continues the path it has been on since Mike Reid became the pastor. By all intents and purposes, he is the Lord of the Flies, and GFC is his kingdom. Perhaps somewhere in his mind, he thinks he’s doing the right thing. Perhaps. However, it’s hard to believe he has missed all the people he has hurt down through the years. Jesus said, by their fruits, you will know them, and for Mike Reid, that fruit looks like it has been trampled and smashed, and I pray nobody else inadvertently stumbles into this place because of the fake reviews.

[1] https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/damage%20control

In Case You Googled Us – A Response

Posted on by kevinjandt

If you insist you are not a cult, there’s a good chance you are a cult. That’s precisely what Grace Fellowship has done in their most recent attempt at answering their critics. As one dear friend pointed out, “Thou dost protest too loudly?” Yes, that is precisely what thou dost. There is no need to go line by line (as they’ve said would be done). Each of the points in their article has been addressed many times, and they have been attested to by multiple witnesses. But just for fun, allow me to make one point.

Here is the quote from the GFC article:

For the first few years after all this commotion began, Grace Fellowship Church made earnest attempts to reach out privately to our accusers to attempt resolution. This included reaching out to former, excommunicated church members (and where applicable, the leadership of their current churches), as well as some of the internet meddlers. In more than one case, we’d even gone so far as to offer to fly pastors of other churches out to meet us—at our own expense—in order to sit down together and examine these matters (see 2LCF, Ch. 26, Par. 15). All such attempts have been rebuffed.

The background is important. I met with Mike Reid multiple times (four to be exact), followed up with an email to confirm my thoughts, and spoke with the elders on one other occasion about legalism and our growing discomfort with the church. Then we left. We left knowing it wasn’t going anywhere. That was obvious. It was apparent to me, my wife, and the countless others who had previously left the church.

We wrote our departure letter and then had a few written exchanges. Within a few days, we were excommunicated for leaving the church. For almost two years, we never publicly criticized them. We didn’t comment on Facebook, nor did I write blog articles naming them. However, I wrote a series on a book called, Churches That Abuse, here. We received more than our fair share of communication from Mike Reid. He sought to reconcile, and we said we would, but I had to understand what it was he was trying to reconcile. He would never say, so we didn’t meet. In July of 2019, we moved to New Mexico. September 30, 2019, I wrote the first article naming them, here. This was over a year and a half after we left.

They say all such attempts (at reconciliation) have been rebuffed.

On December 6th, 2018, I said this in an email.

Mike,

Jen and I have discussed your message, and we are willing to meet.

However, we are not certain we understand what you are wanting to discuss in our meeting. Before we agree to anything, can you please email and tell us what exactly you have in mind to address?

Kevin

He wouldn’t directly answer the question, so we declined. 

I responded to him in an email with this: March 21st, 2021. This provides context as to just how long all this was going on. We sought on numerous occasions to meet with them, but it was always on their terms, and we would not have anything to do with standing in front of a firing squad.

 According to your note, you have made an offer before to meet with the elders of Heritage and us. While this is true, you have failed to mention our offer to meet long before that. I’ve copied our email correspondence if there is any confusion about the time frame the last offer from us took place.

At the very top of the email chain (dated 07 Dec 2018), we offered to meet, and we asked you twice the purpose for our meeting in that text message exchange, but you evaded and avoided the question by continuing to repeat the statement “for my cause in the matter” which in no way indicates the purpose for our meeting. Additionally, we extended an offer previous to that exchange in a letter that I wrote to you (dated 05 Nov 2018), but we didn’t get your response.

I’ve attached both of these documents for all to examine, and I’ve highlighted (07 Dec 18) where I said we would meet or work toward reconciliation and peace; I count 5 or 6 offers in that one exchange. I also pointed out that we need to deal with the root cause of our leaving in that email exchange. I have highlighted some of those crucial elements in these correspondences.

According to your website, gfc still claims to be a Confessional Church, citing the 2nd London Baptist Confession of Faith (gfc’s confession).

In chapter 26, paragraph 15 says this:

Paragraph 15. In cases of difficulties or differences, either in point of doctrine or administration, wherein either the churches in general are concerned, or any one church, in their peace, union, and edification (this applies to us as it relates to you); or any member or members of any church are injured, in or by any proceedings in censures (You censured us by excommunicating us causing injuring to our reputations and future) not agreeable to truth and order (It was an unbiblical excommunication): it is according to the mind of Christ, that many churches holding communion together, do, by their messengers, meet to consider, and give their advice in or about that matter in difference, to be reported to all the churches concerned;29 howbeit these messengers assembled, are not intrusted with any church-power properly so called; or with any jurisdiction over the churches themselves, to exercise any censures either over any churches or persons; or to impose their determination on the churches or officers. 29 Acts 15:2,4,6,22,23,25 30 2 Cor. 1:24; 1 John 4:1

While you have attempted to say that gfc must adjudicate, that is not what the confession teaches.

They have maligned and distorted the truth (some might say bald-faced lies) to suit their own needs more times than I could possibly count, and their whole “non-response” article is loaded with examples of this distortion. I’ve never known of churches to write up something like this, even the most cultish of the cults. Normal places don’t have to defend their practices and then insult others to build themselves up. I have been firm and pointed in my criticisms, that is for sure, but this response tells me they are exactly what they claim not to be (a cult).  But I’ll allow those genuinely seeking both sides to decide for themselves. I’ve linked it here, but I’ve also copied the text below in case they ever remove it.

We recently compiled a list of over 100 names of those who have been spiritually or mentally damaged by Grace Fellowship’s leadership, there are more. These are real people who left the church under duress. We hope and pray they are now in healthy churches. GFC is not a healthy church.

If the leadership of GFC would go back and begin to clean up their messes and repent of their harshness and authoritarianism, to name a few, we would gladly meet with them to discuss all of these things. We would never go back into the lion’s den and stand in front of them all and allow them to abuse us some more. We continue to hope and pray that they will repent of their ways, get right with the people they have hurt, and most of all, get right with the Lord for the damage done to the body of Christ.

Lord have mercy on them.

Kevin

The Grace Fellowship Article – Titled: In Case You Googled Us, linked here: as well as copied below.

Start Here:

Dear Reader,

If you’re reading this page, there’s a pretty good chance that you’ve come across some of the content out on the web containing various accusations made against our church and its leadership over the last several years. It’s also possible that you’ve been visiting our church for a while, and you’ve been sought out via social media by a particular couple who were once members of our church, with the intent to discourage you or scare you away from associating with our church any further. Apparently, in the minds of some, we’re like a cult or something.

While it remains our principled position to limit our interaction with those who revile our church and spread false narratives, we thought it may be helpful to take the time to address a couple things for the benefit of the type of reader described above. 

Why No Public Response?

First, we understand that to some folks the absence of a response from our church to these things over the years could be interpreted as some kind of tacit acknowledgement that the allegations are true, and we have no defense. From time to time, the question arises, “If all of these allegations are false, why doesn’t Grace Fellowship Church respond publicly to all these allegations to clear her name?”

The answer to this is very simple. We do not recognize the court of public opinion to have any authority or standing as relates to adjudicating the affairs of the church. Sadly, in the social media-frenzied age in which we live, the internet is filled with all types of trolls who sit at keyboards all day and think it’s their Christian duty to render an opinion about everything going on under the sun—including giving their opinion on matters of church discipline in churches across the country which they aren’t a part of, involving people whom they’ve never met, and facts that they are in no position to know. Many such people go on to become self-proclaimed “discernment bloggers” who make it their so-called ministry to go around sticking their nose into ecclesiastical affairs they have neither the authority nor the information to adjudicate. They are theological ambulance chasers, hoping to garner attention by “exposing” the evils of this or that church and “protecting God’s people from wolves.” In reality, however, such men don’t know the first thing about caring for God’s sheep or loving the church, and wouldn’t know what a wolf looked like if it was staring at them in the mirror. Truthfully, such men and/or women are nothing but meddlers and busybodies. The Bible has quite a bit to say about these kinds of people, and we would urge the reader to consider this (1 Tim. 5:13, 1 Thes. 4:11, 2 Thes. 3:11, 1 Pet. 4:15, Prov. 20:3, Lev. 19:16).

To summarize, we believe the Scriptures give pretty clear instructions that we are not to feed the trolls. So if you’re waiting for us to give a detailed defense concerning every false allegation, half-truth, twisted truth, one-sided narrative, or flat out lie that’s ever been brought up in a blog or on a podcast about us, we’re afraid you’re just going to have to keep on being disappointed. The internet at large is not owed an explanation or accounting for how a local church conducts its affairs. We maintain that God has given the authority and responsibility to each particular church congregation to adjudicate its own affairs in the fear of the Lord and in obedience to the Scriptures (1 Cor. 5:4-5, 6:1-4. See also 2LCF Ch. 26). Social media keyboard warriors don’t get a seat at the table here, no matter how badly they want it or think they deserve it. That isn’t how church discipline works (see Matt. 18:15-20).

In addition, for our church to offer up our side of the story in each of these cases would require publicly divulging personal details about the lives and conducts of the accusers, which would publicly expose their sins and cast them in a negative light. We are unwilling to do this, even despite their willingness to revile us. We will not return evil for evil in these matters (Rom. 12:17-21). So far as it depends on us, we prayerfully hold out hope in the Lord for reconciliation with the parties involved, and we are perfectly content to wait upon the Lord to do such a work.

As a Reformed Baptist church, we believe in the autonomy and authority of the local church. We believe in the authority of God’s Word. And we believe in the biblical models for conflict resolution, church discipline, and reconciliation. We continue to extend an open, outstretched hand to anyone willing to be reconciled to us, but this reconciliation will only come through the mediation and adjudication of the church, not podcast debates and blog wars.  

Judging a Matter

Second, while we won’t be publishing any sort of response to any of the specific allegations found online concerning our church, we would encourage you to remember that the Bible gives several cautions about judging a matter based on one side of a story (Prov. 18:13, 17, Deut. 13:14). Simply put, dear reader, don’t be so naive as to believe everything you hear or read on the internet. We would invite you to learn about our church and our doctrines by visiting with us, personally, rather than by listening to chopped up, out-of-context audio clips of our pastor pieced together by strangers on the other side of the country, or by listening to long hours of podcasts put together by discernment bloggers giving platform to the grossly exaggerated, one-sided narratives of former members with an obsessive hatred against us. If you think you’re getting an unbiased view of the facts from these sources, then we know a Nigerian prince who would like to talk to you about an inheritance coming your way. 

Why Now? 

After remaining publicly silent about these things for years, some may be wondering why we’ve chosen now as the time to say something. You may also be wondering why you’re detecting a slight touch of sarcasm as you read this. 

For the first few years after all this commotion began, Grace Fellowship Church made earnest attempts to reach out privately to our accusers to attempt resolution. This included reaching out to former, excommunicated church members (and where applicable, the leadership of their current churches), as well as some of the internet meddlers. In more than one case, we’d even gone so far as to offer to fly pastors of other churches out to meet us—at our own expense—in order to sit down together and examine these matters (see 2LCF, Ch. 26, Par. 15). All such attempts have been rebuffed. It’s clear to us that our accusers are only interested in duking it out in a social media cage match, and will entertain no other outcome than the immediate dismemberment and disbanding of our church. 

Perhaps most alarming is the stunning disregard for biblical ecclesiology exhibited by self-promoting internet “pastors” who honestly believe they have the authority to lord over a church hundreds of miles away on the basis of hearsay. We confess boldly in the Lord that such men ought to be ashamed of themselves. 

While our initial disposition was to sincerely, soberly and prayerfully attempt to engage with our accusers, their long track record of hard-hearted indifference for the damage they are doing to the bride of Christ has left us with no reason to take them seriously, and we’ve resolved to obey the apostle’s command to give them no further attention (Tit. 3:10-11). And frankly, the Lord has taught us to laugh a little. He who sits in the heavens laughs at the schemes of the wicked (Ps. 2:4), and we’ve come to learn that sharing in His humor is sometimes the best thing for our souls. While our hearts remain filled with sorrow over the hard realities of persecution and grievous division in Christ’s church, we are confident that the Lord continues to build His church, and His great promise that the gates of hell will not overcome it causes us to remain as cheerful as ever (Matt. 16:18). 

Unfortunately, due to our church’s relatively low internet presence (we have a pretty bland website that rarely gets updated, and we aren’t active on social media), our revilers have been able to do such a bang up job in producing and promoting content against our church that their stuff tends to come up front and center whenever someone Googles our church. We have to give credit where credit is due here. They have soundly beaten us in the SEO game, which means whether we like it or not, visitors and prospective members tend to stumble into this mud regularly, so we have to keep dealing with it. 

In fact, we fully anticipate that even this very writing will be received by our revilers as blood in the water. As soon as they pick up the scent, we expect them to waste no time pouncing on this article, carefully analyzing every word to see what they might use against us. But this does not surprise or dishearten us. It’s the sort of behavior the Scriptures teach us to expect. When Paul warned the Ephesian elders that there would be wolves, he was sure to emphasize that they would be the grievous, savage type (Acts 20:29), not the kind you’d find in a Disney movie. But this article isn’t written for them. Our hope is that this writing might offer the judicious Googler a little insight into our perspective before forming an opinion about us. 

Okay, but Seriously, How Weird are You People?

One of the overarching allegations about our church is that we’re “cultish.” Supposedly we’re all being led astray by a horrible, villainous pastor who rules the church with an iron fist and micromanages every aspect of the personal lives of every congregant. Frankly, as a congregation, we hold these assertions to be—if we may speak so plainly—pretty dumb. We’re certainly prepared to grant that our church is a little weird, but only because we’re black coffee Calvinists, and we still use paper hymnals (campaigns to convince the elders to move to a 1990’s overhead projector have thus far been unsuccessful, but we’re slowly grinding them down). 

In seriousness, we at Grace Fellowship Church take the gospel and the doctrine of the church very seriously, and we do so in an age where these truths are being greatly assaulted even within many evangelical circles. To many Christians, church is a thing you go to on Sunday when you feel like it, rather than something you’re a vital member of (1 Cor. 12:27). To many Christians, being a member of the body of Christ is an ethereal concept, rather than a reality to be lived out in the context of a real life congregation. Many Christians are largely unknown in the churches they attend. Many have never even met the men whom they consider to be their pastors. 

We believe this ought not be so. We take seriously God’s design for individual Christians to be joined to particular churches, to be in fellowship with particular brothers and sisters, and under the pastoral care of particular men appointed by the church as elders. We believe no Christian is meant to live their life in anonymity or seclusion apart from the love, nurture, and fellowship of the local church (Acts 2:41-47, 14:23, 20:28, Rom. 12:4-5, Col. 3:16, Heb. 10:24-25, 13:17).

The difficult thing about real fellowship is that it involves being close enough to people to sin against them and be sinned against. It also means having our own sins exposed. This indeed can be uncomfortable, but we hold that it is simply God’s good design for the continued growth and sanctification of the Christian, as we live out the Christian life together, and God continues his good work of transforming each of us more and more into the image of His Son (Rom. 8:29). The New Testament is filled with exhortations for Christians to forgive one another (Eph. 4:32), bear with one another in love (Col. 3:13), bear one another’s burdens (Gal. 6:2), to strive for unity (Phil. 1:27), etc. All of these commands presuppose that we’re going to be up in each others’ grill sometimes. And we say, “Amen” to all of it. 

If this sounds cultish to you, then we’re happy to be guilty as charged. But in a world where church life has been largely relegated to a Sunday morning TED Talk, you’ll have to forgive us if we don’t take the charge too seriously. Besides, there are plenty of other Reformed Baptist and even Presbyterian churches with whom we fraternize that receive the same kinds of insults, and we’re pretty content to consider ourselves to be in good company (1 Pet. 5:9).

Fear Not the Chained Lions

In his classic work, The Pilgrim’s Progress, John Bunyan paints a brilliant allegorical picture of the Christian life. One scene in the book has to do with the Christian coming into the church. Following his conversion, Christian (the main character) finds himself ascending a hill called Difficulty. At the top of the hill is a palace called Beautiful (representing the church). As Christian comes to enter the great house, he is met by two lions blocking the way.

“. . .[Christian] made haste and went forward, that if possible he might get lodging there. Now, before he had gone far, he entered into a very narrow passage, which was about a furlong off the porter’s lodge; and looking very narrowly before him as he went, he espied two lions in the way. Now, thought he, I see the dangers that Mistrust and Timorous were driven back by. (The lions were chained, but he saw not the chains.) Then he was afraid, and thought also himself to go back after them, for he thought nothing but death was before him. . . “

Readers have long wondered what exactly Bunyan meant to represent by the imagery of the two lions. Many believe that these represented the powers of civil government and the state church which, in Bunyan’s day, were persecuting Christians to discourage them from joining local churches not sanctioned by the Church of England. Regardless of the specific interpretation, what we know for sure is that these lions represent forces which serve to discourage Christians from joining themselves to Christ’s church. These lions served to scare travelers from going any further, and instead to force them to go back.   

Sadly, we observe that many such lions exist in the world. There are many people—professing Christians, even—who make it their aim to stop people from venturing into the safety and nurture of a local church. Some of these lions come in the form of arrogant internet trolls like the ones we described above. Some of them come in the form of former church members or apostate Christians who through their unbelief and hard-heartedness have given themselves to such disgruntledness that they now make it their life’s work to oppose and ridicule the churches they once called home. Our church is hardly the first to endure this kind of thing, and we won’t be the last.

So we’d leave the reader with this encouragement, from what came next in the story:

“But the porter at the lodge, whose name is Watchful, perceiving that Christian made a halt as if he would go back, cried unto him, saying, “Is your strength so small?” Fear not the lions, for they are chained, and are placed there for trial of faith where it is, and for discovery of those that had none. Keep in the midst of the path, no hurt shall come unto you.”

Whether you end up deciding to visit our church or not, we exhort you in the Lord not to be scared by the lions. Trust in Christ, and join yourself to a local church. Your soul needs it. Don’t let the internet trolls rob you of the nourishment and grace God has for you through the means of the local church. 

The Lord hates a false witness who breathes out lies, and the one who sows discord among brothers (Prov. 6:19). We continue to pray fervently that those who strive to tear apart the body of Christ will be granted repentance. The Husband will not fail to avenge every offense committed against His beloved Bride. Let those who fear the Lord take heed and tremble. 

May the Lord Jesus Christ be glorified through the sanctifying of His people. May His churches be filled. May the earth be filled with the knowledge of His glory as the waters cover the seas. 

May the Lord bless you. 

Warmly and Sincerely, 
The Members of Grace Fellowship Church

May 14, 2024

What is Slander?

Posted on by kevinjandt

Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with malice (Ephesians 4:31). 

Over the years I have been accused of slander. While I have no doubt those who accuse me of such a thing are searching for a way to discredit me because I’ve said a lot of things about them. What I’ve said has been pointed and sharp. I’ve been critical and used a serrated edge in many instances, but slander is a whole different thing. Actually, since I’ve written most of these things, technically, it’s called libel, but that seems to be splitting hairs, at least from my point of view. I have written hard things about them, that is for sure. They don’t like it, that’s also for sure. In one case, they disliked it so much that they wrote the elders asking them to ask me to stop.  To the credit of these elders, they investigated and replied that they didn’t believe I had done anything wrong and told us to obey our conscience.

The issue of slander is real in the church. There are people who say things or write things about others that are not true, or the truth is distorted. That might be what my accusers think, I don’t know for sure. We haven’t discussed it. No matter, they don’t appreciate it. The New Testament contains the word slander ten times. It’s a tough word. I don’t mean the word is hard to say, it’s something that can do real damage to people.

In the verse above, Paul tells the Christians in Ephesus that they need to put away these things. They all go together. Bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, slander, and malice. I don’t have to define each of these words for you, most of us have a good idea what they mean. But often slander, in most people’s minds, is saying mean things about someone. That is partially true, especially from the other person’s perspective.

The definition of slander is speech injurious to someone’s good name. It is effectually designed to tear down and hurt them, but the clincher is the statements are untrue.

Here is a helpful definition from the Pocket Dictionary of Ethics,

The act of uttering false statements, or disseminating misinformation, for the purpose of defaming or injuring the reputation of another person. Technically, slander occurs when the defamatory statement is articulated in a transient form such as audible speech. When the form is more permanent, such as in writing or a public broadcast, it becomes libel, and thus potentially a criminal offense.[1]

The Catholic Encyclopedia adds that it is known the person is innocent.

Slander is the attributing to another of a fault of which one knows him to be innocent. It contains a twofold malice, that which grows out of damage unjustly done to our neighbor’s good name and that of lying as well. [2]

The warning here, and especially from Scripture, is that it is hurtful and sinful. The warnings are abundant, and Jesus says it comes from the heart (Matt. 15:19, Mark 7:22).

I wrote this in a previous article that I think outlines my point. If I said or wrote that someone was a bank robber and my intent was to harm their reputation, knowing it wasn’t true, that would qualify as slander or libel. However, if I wrote or said they were a bank robber and they had been arrested, tried, and convicted of being a bank robber, that is not slander or libel. In no way do I intend to say something untrue about them to injure them.

With the case in point, as it relates to those I’ve been accused of slandering, it is my opinion, backed up by my experience, and the facts that I have stated these people are what I’ve claimed. For example, I’ve written a lengthy article on why I believe Mike Reid and the elders of Grace Fellowship are disqualified from ministry. This is not just my opinion. It is backed up by the things I stated above. My experience, the facts, and other eyewitnesses. I have no desire to defend myself to them, that is a lost cause, but what I wish to do is make a point made by Andrew Rappaport in one of the podcasts I participated. He said, if those making the accusation of slander cannot provide the evidence of slander, then they are the one slandering. In other words, if Mike Reid claims I’m slandering him, and he does, he needs to show me where I’ve done so. If he can’t, or he won’t, then he is slandering me.

I have abundant evidence of their claim of my slander. I’d like to know where I’ve slandered them. I believe I can provide evidence of every claim I’ve made that is derogatory about them, and that is a long list. It is a list attested to by many witnesses. It’s not an off-the-cuff thing, like he is a bank robber. I take my Christianity seriously, and I don’t want to willingly slander anyone. What I know is the practices and the things that occur at Grace Fellowship are damaging to people. Countless people. And with no end in sight. If Mike wants to believe that is slander he is welcome to think that, but I think I have plenty of evidence to support my case. I look forward to hearing what he has to say, but I expect I won’t.  

Kevin Jandt

[1] Stanley J. Grenz and Jay T. Smith, Pocket Dictionary of Ethics, The IVP Pocket Reference Series (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2003), 109.

[2] Joseph Delany, “Slander,” in The Catholic Encyclopedia: An International Work of Reference on the Constitution, Doctrine, Discipline, and History of the Catholic Church, ed. Charles G. Herbermann et al. (New York: The Encyclopedia Press; The Universal Knowledge Foundation, 1907–1913).

Mental Health and the Church

Posted on by kevinjandt

Sometimes, we can say or write things that strike a chord with people. That can be good or bad, but it can also be profitable in causing someone to think. This should always be the goal when approaching sensitive topics. Most often, I see people who have formed their opinions or come to their convictions are rarely convinced to move outside their box and consider other views. I’m this way with certain things, and I’m sure you are. Mental health and the church should not be at odds with one another, but often that is the case. Is there room for modern methods, such as psychology and neuroscience,[1] that still allow for the sufficiency of Scripture in counseling? I sure hope so.

Recently, a man I knew committed suicide, and it set off, in my mind, a discussion and a renewed interest in the topic of mental health. What is the role of mental health in the life of a Christian? The Christian church is always and consistently under attack from the outside but also from the inside. Paul said that from within, savage wolves would arise (Acts 20:29-30). Mental health, similarly, arises from within. The secret thoughts of the mind, and those that come from a broken mind, can be the undoing or that which causes the greatest damage.

I also believe the church is ill-equipped to handle many of these challenges. I don’t mean all are ill-equipped, nor do I mean to say, “I am equipped.” Like many pastors and Seminary students, I’ve taken a semester of counseling. I even thought I would pursue this more, but I have not, at least for now. I’ve seen the lopsidedness of many, especially in the Reformed movement. I also want to acknowledge that I’m grateful for the course I took that sought to balance Christian and secular counseling.

Allow me to illustrate using examples from two well-known Christian counselors.

In his book, The Christian Counselor’s Manual – The Practice of Nouthetic Counseling, Jay Adams writes,

“Counseling, therefore, must be understood and conducted as a spiritual battle. The counselor must consider himself a solider of Christ engaged in spiritual warfare when counseling. For that battle the ‘full armour of God’ alone is sufficient. Unbelieving counselors not only lack such equipment, but moreover, obviously are totally ignorant of the true nature of this situation. In Fact, since they are soldiers in the army of Satan, they are on the other side and, therefore, hardly can be relied upon to free Christian counselees from Satan’s grips.” [2]

Adams, footnotes this quote and says, “Not that God, in His amazing providence, at times does not use unsaved persons to do just that and thus ‘make the wrath of man to praise Him.’ But, as faithful Christians, our responsibility is to turn to Christian counselors and not to test the Lord (Galatians 6:1). See The Big Umbrella, pp. 146-155.”

The quotation says a lot about Adams’s philosophy of counseling, and while I find the statement problematic on several levels, which I hope becomes clear through this article, he is not completely wrong. Yes, an unbeliever will not understand the spiritual nature of the battle, and their goal is not to have the counselee in right relationship with God, but are they unequipped to understand situations and offer valuable assistance? Are they ignorant to counsel someone who is hurting? Adams seems to hedge his bet with the footnote, and perhaps there is some hesitation within his thought process.

Can we take his words and apply them to other fields of study? What about modern medicine, say, a heart surgeon? Is he unequipped to perform an open-heart surgery because he is not a believer? Why does the Christian look at those who study the brain, in relationship to neuroscience or childhood development or modern psychology, as voodoo science when it comes to helping those in need, even Christian patients? I realize I’m painting with a wide brush by including different fields of study. Still, these have all too often been viewed as illegitimate by many Christians. Not only illegitimate but often ridiculed.

I want to clarify that I’m not discounting the authority or sufficiency of Scripture, but Scripture does not speak to every single issue and offers solutions to all possible scenarios. For example, what about Alzheimer’s and Dementia, or brain injuries that can occur through a car accident or other severe damage? What about childhood trauma or spiritual abuse? These are different categories and can include not only physical damage but also spiritual damage.

Edward Welch wrote in his book Blame It on the Brain? – Distinguishing Chemical Imbalances, Brain Disorders, and Disobedience“

I have found that a rudimentary understanding of brain functioning can be very useful when it comes to understanding and helping others. For example, a knowledge of brain function can help us answer questions about chemical imbalances and the appropriateness of psychiatric medicines. It can help us understand people whose ability to learn and think are different from our own. And it can also help us distinguish between physical and spiritual problems.”[3]

Welch’s understanding and writing include these important categories, yet he doesn’t excuse sin. In my experience, I’ve encountered a few people who are disciples of Adams, and they were not nearly as gracious as what is required for good counseling. I also do not want to throw the baby out with the bathwater. Adams has written many books on counseling, and they contain helpful and useful information for applying biblical truth to situations. Still, sadly, I see him held up as the standard bearer and his methods as gospel by some who lack empathy.

Developing discernment and having a heart of compassion combined with education, knowledge, and experience is the best guide to appropriate counseling. Rarely are things one size fits all. Welch shows balance. “Because theology is the lens through which Christians interpret all research, and it is essential that our lenses be clear and accurate.” [4] Welch never dismisses the biblical view of brain research but instead applies it where and when necessary while still acknowledging the value of modern sciences and areas of study, such as “genetics, neurochemistry, and brain injury and disease.”[5]

What I’ve observed seems to be an overreaction to modern psychology, neuroscience, childhood development, and similar fields that many Christians label secular and dismiss any value they may hold. They take it to the extreme, and while I know there are extremes and bad practitioners in these fields, there are also bad actors in the Christian community who do more harm by outright rejecting these sciences. Things are rarely black or white.

I cannot hold your attention with the many categories involved, so let me mention depression as a general overview. Welch, quoting Martha Manning and William Styron, writes, “Depression has been called ‘a room in hell,’ a howling tempest in the brain.” Welch goes on to describe it like this, “When you listen to people describe their depression, you will hear two extremes. People will report that the pain is so intense that they want to die. Others will describe an emotional numbness in which they are already dead. Sometimes you will hear one person describe living with both extremes simultaneously.” [6]

The cause is not easy to determine, but it is real for the person suffering from depression. Welch once again describes this through the words of a friend, “A friend of mine wrote, ‘I am suicidal again. I have no energy or reason to fight. I am numb and tried all the things I know how to try. I know I won’t be able to function like this much longer. There is no one to talk to. I’m suffocating. I can think the best thoughts all day and I still feel like this. No one knows how badly I want to die. My thoughts are obsessive and won’t stop. They keep saying, ‘I want to die.’” [7]  

The cost of a misdiagnosis here can be deadly. When well-meaning or not-so-well-meaning pastors or counselors attempt to lump this all under the banner of sin, there are bound to be consequences. Offering the wrong counsel can have deadly effects. Here is the danger of relying strictly on a nouthetic counselor like Adams. We know David had depression, as did Paul, Elijah, and Jeremiah. And the well-known preacher Charles Spurgeon. The brain is a complex machine capable of all kinds of things we know little about.

While counseling should involve the Scriptures and the spiritual, I am hard-pressed to say medications, modern psychology, and brain science are sinful. I often say that if one needs counsel outside the church, seek one that is not hostile to the Bible or Christianity. The surface has been barely scratched on this topic. It is deep, wide, and complicated. I caution those involved in counseling to seek the wisdom from above but never discount the opportunities from those trained to understand the brain at a higher level. This does not call into question God’s word or His authority. It does not discount the value of speaking about spiritual things to spiritual people. The Bible is sufficient, but God has given us His common grace that extends to all of mankind, including scientific developments that greatly value human existence and real human problems.

Most importantly, no matter where you land on this topic, love must be the guiding principle in all we do. As mentioned above, many have formed strong opinions about this topic and the answers. What I don’t think you will find in the Scriptures is a clear command seeking help outside the church is sinful. It seems to me Jay Adams takes it that far, and I think that is a shame. If you believe it is sinful, how would you counsel or speak with someone who doesn’t share your view? Will harsh judgment and condemnation rule your spirit, or can you say with Paul without love, you are a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal? (1 Cor. 13:1).

Understanding and dealing with those who experience depression or other similar issues demands love and compassion. As Christians, we should be known for our compassion and empathy. Here are some examples of what not to say, and these are direct quotes from friends who struggle,

“Depression is just a sin. It means you don’t have enough faith.”

“What do you have to be depressed/anxious about? Isn’t your joy in the Lord?”

“Jesus was a man of many sorrows for you. Why would you want to hold onto what he took away?”

“Try harder to have more joy. You worry too much about being happy. Happiness is fleeting. Joy is in God. I mean, what are you saying to God when you complain?”

“You’re suicidal? I thought you were saved?”

Rather than being one of Job’s worthless counselors, start by being slow to speak and quick to listen. Be a friend and show empathy. Be gentle and kind in your answers, especially when you don’t understand or can’t relate. I want to leave you with a beautiful poem by my dear friend Todd Pearson. He has struggled with depression for many years. You will hear and feel his pain. Above all, may the Lord guide us in His wisdom and His love for those who suffer (2 Corinthians 3-11).

Ne’er Again the Light

…The nature of my soul is singular…
…There are darkened corners in recesses of my being…
…Shades of shadows are the depth of my rest…
…Darkness cloaks the guttural visceral reality of living…

…People speak of light but ne’er fathom perilous substance…
…Light of love…
…Luminescence of such amity…

…Yet, what of sleep…
…Slumber finds you in its arms in depths of darkness…
…Best reveries happen upon us in deep darkness embraced…
…Vast nebulous expanses ill lit mark the safest of our hours…

-Ne’er Again the Light-

…Hollowness of words uttered mark emptied mastery…
…Deity is luminosity…
… Sanctuary is sunlit existence…
…Veracity is brightness as lies lie in the twilight of betrayal…

…Heave your burdens out from the penumbra of self-isolation…
…Diurnal course brings sanctified sanctuaried healing of the pnuema…
…The best of intellect is bright…
…Yet the least of intellect is darkness…

…Embrace light to grasp at hope…
…The matter of very being is woven of strands of ascendent illumination…
…To dwell there is to persevere in the peace of the masses…

-Ne’er Again the Light-

…Yet truth rests betwixt the shadows…
…The one, say even I, that has only ever known dark…
…Must remain in its abiding shelter or know only pain…
… Conditioned to interweave solemn invulnerability with eclipse…

… Finding solace within the apportioned lot of one’s progenitor…
…Seizing upon the succor of the known…
… Shrinking instead from the light of inconceivable joy…

-Ne’er Again the Light-

… Had it been the best it would have been preferable…
… Better to have never known the consolation of light…
… Then to evermore dread its substance…

-Ne’er Again the Light-

…One dwells in the comfort of what is known…
… Branching as it were on the tenebrous existence of habitual tranquility…
…Amity of that arises from trepidation of experienced felicity…

… Preferable to the aching soul…
… To have never known such bliss…
… To have never clung to such joy…

… Then to have participated in facade of mocking reality…
…To have given attestation to such hope…
…That the burdened pnuema could ever behold…
…. such joy…

…No ne’er again the light…
-No-
-Ne’er again the light-

[1] I am using some of these terms somewhat synonymously, but neuroscience deals with the physical brain, whereas psychology deals with issues in the mind. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/neuroscience

[2] Jay E. Adams, The Christian Counselor’s Manual: The Practice of Nouthetic Counseling, (Grand Rapids, MI, Zondervan, 1973), 117.

[3] Edward T. Welch, Blame it on the brain?: Distinguishing chemical imbalances, brain disorders, and disobedience. (Phillipsburg, NJ, P & R Publishing, 1998), 12.

[4] Ibid., 15

[5] Ibid., 19

[6] Ibid., 116

[7] Ibid., 117

A Response to Ryan Peterson’s Funeral “Sermons”

Posted on by kevinjandt

The word of the Lord came to me: 2 “Son of man, prophesy against the shepherds of Israel; prophesy, and say to them, even to the shepherds, Thus says the Lord God: Ah, shepherds of Israel who have been feeding yourselves! Should not shepherds feed the sheep? 3 You eat the fat, you clothe yourselves with the wool, you slaughter the fat ones, but you do not feed the sheep. 4 The weak you have not strengthened, the sick you have not healed, the injured you have not bound up, the strayed you have not brought back, the lost you have not sought, and with force and harshness you have ruled them (Ezekiel 34:1-4).

This article is a follow-up to my open letter to Ryan Peterson’s friends and family. In that letter, I desired to offer comfort and hope that Ryan’s life was properly and lovingly acknowledged. It is my deepest and most sincere desire to highlight the goodness in Ryan. The goodness that flowed to him through his relationship with his Lord Jesus Christ. Yes, I fully believe Ryan was a Christian, and as I said in my first article, that was not contingent upon his confession of sin or lack thereof but only on the work of Christ.

While I desire to be kind and gracious, what I heard from these funeral messages was grievous and unnecessary. It is the tone and tenor of which these grotesque examples of sermons were preached. It was as if they had no life experience with Ryan and didn’t believe him to be a saved man, although they didn’t dare to come right out and say it. What they did was hint around the topic and leave the audience wondering what egregious sin had taken over Ryan to cause him to end his life.

There was an agenda to this funeral service, and the only desire from those leading was to make their points with as much rigor and demand as they place on the lives of their congregants on a day-in and day-out basis. The Christian life was never designed to be under authoritarian rule. If you picked up anything from those sermons, I trust you saw the authoritarian and hostile environment GFC represents.

God has something to say about those who rule harshly, and the passage above was a firm rebuke to those shepherds of Israel who had a self-focused agenda. The passage needs little to no explanation. As for those who had to endure these sermons, I want to point out a few things about what the passage says: “The weak you have not strengthened (verse 4).” When you went to the funeral of Ryan Peterson, were you weak? Did you feel sick, injured, and lost? Was there a great loss to your soul?

Perhaps you thought you would hear good things about Ryan and his life that would strengthen or lift you, but it didn’t. It only felt condemning and harsh, “with force and harshness, you have ruled them.” What type of encouragement was this, and what was it designed to do, or who was it designed to serve?

Well, it certainly didn’t bring grace to the hearer. Despite Mike Reid mentioning he was a pastor at Grace Fellowship Church, grace was never mentioned again. Grace should have been the central focus; instead, it was sin.

The topic of sin is a popular one at GFC. It is THE topic. A great deal of time and energy is devoted to rooting out the sins of the congregation. This can be done through preaching, as you just experienced, personal interaction with the pastors, or via the admonishments of the other congregants.

It is a difficult society to reside in if you have sin, which we all do (1 John 1:8-9). These sermons were a looking glass into a society that has left countless people on the brink of hopelessness as they continue to muddle through another joyless day. You are only as good as your last interaction. They seem to forget that our worth is in Christ, not in behaviors and actions. Listening to Tyler preach, I wondered the point of bringing up Ryan’s sin and why this was so important.

I hate to refresh your memory on what he said, but this is warped and twisted thinking of a man who should seek to expound the glories of a Savior. Tyler said, “In the last four weeks, there have been hidden sins discovered that Ryan had kept from everyone for quite a long time.” “The weight of unconfessed, hidden sin will destroy anyone.” [1] (30:50).

Then he makes a disclaimer. “If anyone hears this and is shocked, and it makes them think differently about Ryan, it shouldn’t because the Bible says no one is good.”

I wish I could say I don’t understand what he is trying to say. The message here is loud and clear, having spent much time with these people. For the disclaimer’s sake, this is only my opinion, as is the rest of this article, but Ryan’s memory deserves better than this.

In modern parlance, Bolkema is deflecting away from the responsibility they, as “shepherds,” bear. It’s not anyone’s fault, but Ryan’s because of his sin. His sin killed him. He was hiding it, and it destroyed him. It leaves me so empty and hollow inside thinking that this is how they cast dispersion onto Ryan and relieve themselves of any role they may have played in Ryan’s frame of mind, of which nobody truly knows except for him and God.

Here is the problem for them. They have no category for any mental illness, mental collapse, breakdown, depression, or a short-term imbalance in the brain. In GFC theology, the only answer is sin. Studying the brain and the science involved in knowing the countless scenarios that can bring a person to such an end is not a simple, black-or-white solution (See Tony Miano’s post below). It is shameful they said that Ryan decided to abandon his family, but this puts the focus on him and draws it away from them.

As one pastor I spoke to said, “You don’t minister to the living by kicking the dead,” and that is an awful burden for all those who loved Ryan to have to bear. In medical terms, this is a case of malpractice and misconduct. It is a gross case of misdiagnosis. You would think that showing grace, mercy, and compassion to those left behind and an invitation to search out the God that sent His Son to die for sinners might offer a more compassionate approach. Still, you have Mike Reid preaching the message he has preached for fifteen years: sin, judgment, and condemnation.

Who preaches a message like this, at a funeral no less, without believing these people need to be clubbed over the head rather than shown that Christ is a loving God that offers forgiveness from sin and rest from a weary world? Can the message of salvation be preached without berating and belittling?

Why can’t they say that we know Ryan was struggling, but we saw evidence of faith in his life, and we have complete confidence that he’s with the Lord?

Why?

Because sin is so important to their theology, Forty-one (41) times, Reid says the word sin or a derivation of the word in his “sermon,” now, to be fair, about six (6) of those discuss Christ as not having been a sinner, but that is still thirty-five (35) times he is discussing sin. He also uses the word wrath fourteen (14) times, condemn or condemned nine (9) times, and judgment four (4) times.  And keep in mind this was only a 15-minute sermon.

In contrast, he only mentions grace when he states he’s a pastor at Grace Fellowship Church. He uses the word mercy three (3) times (outside of the song they sing at the end), and forgiveness is only mentioned once. He uses the word love three times in the context of God’s love.  

This imbalance could not be more obvious. If I went back through all the years of Reid’s preaching nothing has changed. The imbalance here is unbearable and the primary reason we left and so many others left through the years.

In his excellent work, The Whole Christ, Sinclair Ferguson writes, “In essence [legalism] it is any teaching that diminishes or distorts the generous love of God and the full freeness of his grace. It then distorts God’s graciousness revealed in his law and fails to see law set within its proper context in redemptive history as an expression of a gracious Father. This is the nature of legalism. Indeed we might say these are the natures of legalism.” [2]

In one sentence, Ferguson mentions grace three times. The gospel is good news, but one would be hard-pressed to walk away from those sermons, having received this as good news. For anyone who would listen, it isn’t easy to endure these men’s preaching, demeanor, and tone, which tragically hinders the good news.

Sinclair Ferguson highlights how important tone can be to preaching, “[T]he same reality was noted in the life and ministry of Robert Murray M’Cheyne. It was perhaps most movingly expressed in a letter that lay unopened on his desk on the day he died at the age of twenty-nine. A correspondent writing to thank him for a sermon he had preached commented that it was not merely what he had said but the manner in which he spoke that had made an indelible impression.” [3]

It is hard to miss the “tone” that emanates out of the mouths of Reid and Bolkema. It rarely, if ever, appeals to the conscience in a way that exudes love, care, and compassion, but its focus is the legal demands of the law and a heavy conviction of sin. That is not to say sin has no bearing on the life of one coming to Christ, but for the ministry of GFC, it is an ever-present formula presented to the congregation in a fire-hose manner.

Someday, I pray they will see the truth of what this place has done to people. They crush the spirit, wound the soul, and feed themselves rather than the people. I can only guess the food they enjoy is their quest for power and dominance. How can I make such a claim? It comes down to my experience, observations, and what the Scriptures teach us. Several key passages show us the evidence of false teaching. Listen to the words of these verses,

Jesus said, “Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves. You will recognize them by their fruits” (Matt 7:15—16).

False prophets are called wolves, and what do wolves do to sheep, but kill and eat them, and the fruits of their teaching evidence this. I’ve written consistently about the damage done and specifically highlighted testimonies of those damaged through the years.

Yet because of false brothers secretly brought in—who slipped in to spy out our freedom that we have in Christ Jesus, so that they might bring us back into slavery— (Gal 2:4).

False brothers will destroy Christian liberty and freedoms. External appearances will always judge you, and freedom and liberty will be destroyed.

But false prophets also arose among the people, just as there will be false teachers among you, who will secretly bring in destructive heresies, even denying the Master who bought them, bringing upon themselves swift destruction (2 Pet. 2:1).

The warnings are abundant, and these people will arise from within Christianity, as Paul also said in Acts 20:28. Again, he says these are wolves, and they will not spare the flock. When the flock is scattered, injured, wounded, and left uncared for, that is evidence of false prophets or wolves. Paul likely had Ezekiel 34 in mind as he said these words to the Ephesian elders.  

The leadership of Grace Fellowship has a long and illustrious track record of this behavior. For those affected by this place, you are left to pick up the pieces, you will someday want answers, and I write as one willing to try and help answer them. Those calls, emails, or messages have, will, and do come. I have responded to many of them, and I pray someday, there will be answers that can help you cope with the damage that has been done.

It is not a healthy environment. It is not a place where you can take rest and comfort. It is rightly called a high-demand group for good reason. They will demand a lot from you, they will take a lot from you, and the only way NOT to be a victim is to speak out. I pray that anyone who reads this will understand my desire to expose such evil and call it what it is.

In Christ’s love, for Christ’s true church.

Kevin

[1] https://www.sermonaudio.com/sermoninfo.asp?SID=1113232254135642

[2] Sinclair Ferguson, The Whole Christ, Legalism, Antinomianism, & Gospel Assurance—Why the Marrow Controversy Still Matters, (Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 2016), 95.

[3] Ibid., 228.