Articles

Faith Beyond Fear – A True Story

Posted on December 15, 2025December 15, 2025 by kevinjandt

In the years since we left Grace Fellowship, I have consulted with many people regarding the topic of spiritual abuse and manipulation. I have spoken to the disenfranchised about this growing problem—good and honest people who have been abused and manipulated.

I have written elsewhere asking the question, ‘Why?’ Why does someone want to control someone else? Especially, in the name of religion? Is God actually in the business of allowing leaders to have complete dominance and control over congregants’ lives? I hope you know that the answer is no. The Bible takes a strong stance against such behavior, yet many still do it. Christianity is about freedom. Freedom from tyranny and freedom from sin. Christ paid the price in full.

Today, I’m presenting a personal testimony from a woman who knows the situation and the people, specifically the leader, Mike Reid, very well. She admittedly had many problems at the time. She was in an abusive relationship. She was using controlled substances to mask the pain. She had suffered severe trauma as an adult and a child. She could have been the ideal target for love and support. The church could have helped her, taken her in, and gotten her on her feet, but, according to her, it didn’t.

She wants to tell her story. She wants people to know the truth about what happened to her, and others will see the reality of the dark side of not only GFC but also other places like it.

Below, I present her story.

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Breaking the Cycle: How I Escaped Control and Found Faith Beyond Fear

By Anonymous Contributor

For most of my life, my family’s story was one of control, silence, and shame. What began as a search for spiritual truth became, for me, a painful lesson in how easily faith can be twisted into something that imprisons rather than heals.

A close family member, once successful in business, reinvented himself as a spiritual leader. His message was persuasive and confident, but his ministry operated through dominance and fear. He demanded obedience, discouraged independent thought, and insisted that anyone who disagreed with his teachings was in rebellion against God.

I watched the same patterns play out within his household. His marriage seemed built on control rather than partnership, and his “conversion” appeared to change only the form—not the intent—of his authority. In religion, he found a new way to command loyalty and admiration.

My own involvement with his congregation came at a time when I was desperate for stability. I was leaving an abusive relationship, struggling with addiction, and navigating the complexities of child-welfare oversight. Instead of being offered compassion, I found myself judged, shamed, and pressured to surrender decisions about my newborn daughter. What was framed as “help” quickly became coercion.

I endured long, intimidating meetings meant to break me down emotionally and spiritually. Every failure was magnified, every attempt to defend myself seen as pride or sin. I felt stripped of dignity and made to believe that I was beyond God’s grace. Even after I completed recovery programs, regained custody of my children, and rebuilt my life, the judgment continued.

Over time, I saw how wealth, image, and power were central to this version of faith. The group attracted families who could support its ambitions, while humility and service were rarely practiced. It became clear that obedience mattered more than compassion, and that anyone who questioned leadership was silenced or shamed.

My story doesn’t begin or end with that experience. I grew up in a family marked by addiction, violence, and abandonment. When I experienced trauma as a teenager, I was blamed instead of protected. That legacy of shame carried into adulthood, shaping the choices I made and the relationships I entered. But healing began when I finally accepted that my worth was not defined by the past—or by anyone else’s judgment.

Through faith, therapy, and the unwavering love of my husband, I began to rebuild. I have been sober for many years, have full custody of my three children, and recently created a stable home where love, not fear, defines our days. My children and I still live with the echoes of trauma, but we are free.

I now understand that true faith brings liberation, not bondage. It offers grace, not condemnation. The message I was once taught to fear has become my greatest comfort: that God’s love is not something we must earn through obedience to another person—it’s something freely given, powerful enough to redeem even the most painful past.

I share my story to give hope to anyone who feels trapped by shame, manipulation, or spiritual control. Healing is possible. Freedom is possible. And no one—no matter how broken they’ve been told they are—is beyond the reach of grace.

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Thankfully, her story took a different turn, and she has powerfully experienced God’s grace. In our many exchanges, she repeatedly reiterates that she has her life back. She is happily married, has all her children, and is doing well. This still haunts her, and these things bring out the pain, but it is crucial for her to warn others and fight back in a way she couldn’t before.

To explain herself, she told me this, “If I remain silent to the world, then I feel I’m not being the instrument God intended if I keep quiet and allow such veil abuse to be spread using God’s word. I have lived most of my life trying to manage the abuse, be worthy, and be loved. God gave me the strength to come back from death and find love. It took 30+ years, but it happened. I was tested, I made mistakes, I struggled, but God’s love, patience, and grace have carried me into a dream life. I even have the Pickett fence.”

There is another issue she wants to tell people about. It is the problem of multi-generational trauma. The church in Davenport defines things in black-and-white categories: sin or non-sin. These problems stem from generations of sinful behavior that have been inherited and passed down to children. She believes she has broken the cycle and will continue to break it for her family. It is the thing she desires above all. She wants her story known and heard so that others might be encouraged to break this cycle of abuse. We hope others will see that the grace of God is far bigger than anyone’s manipulation or control. He provides all that is necessary for life and godliness, and those professing religion need to should show their godliness through good works, not manipulation or deceit.

“Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.” James 1:27

Get Rid of Your Pants

Posted on May 7, 2025May 7, 2025 by kevinjandt

I came across something today that reminded me of certain types of black-and-white thinking. I’ve had an audio recording from a long time ago that I’ve contemplated writing about for just as long. It highlights and summarizes the nature of an extreme fundamentalist school of thought.

Before I share the nature of this topic, if you haven’t figured it out yet, I want to mention what I saw that triggered my interest in this subject. It’s a school of thought that makes things so much easier in life. If you can tell someone here is the line, don’t cross it, that makes life easier. That’s the way to make Christianity more clearly defined. There are rules. You should know them, and you should live by them.

But is that true?

The majority of these issues stem from this desire to live a holy life. I’m not against a holy life, I don’t believe it’s insignificant. Jesus had a lot to say about sin and holiness.

“Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin it would be better for him if a great millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea. And if your hand causes you to sin, cut it off. It is better for you to enter life crippled than with hands to go to hell, to the unquenchable fire (Matt 9:42-43).

Our nature is to gravitate toward the law. We are all, naturally, legalists. It’s easier. If women can be taught that they need to get rid of their pants, especially if their husband thinks that’s better than they should, right?

Can you show me where the text says we need to do that?

I saw an interesting Facebook post that featured a picture of a woman’s leg, with lines starting at the ankle and progressively moving up. The post said, if you’re such and such an age, you should wear your skirt here. If you’re younger, you get more leeway, apparently. It was so cringeworthy I couldn’t help but laugh and think about this recording. Okay, it’s not skirt lengths in this, but it’s possibly worse.

Let’s ditch the pants.

In a woman’s bible study, the woman asked if her husband wants her to get rid of her pants, should she? The “leader” quips, “Is your first answer, yes!”

I can’t help but think about the craziness this creates in the church world. It becomes a religion of appearances. Am I suggesting anything goes? No, I’m not. But is holiness defined by externals? That’s what it becomes. We have the opportunity to judge our neighbor by our standards. It really makes us feel good about ourselves when we can see that Mr. and Mrs. So and So are not running their home as well as we are. Now, I feel a lot better about myself. It becomes a heavy burden to bear because I have to work hard to keep up my image.

Some of the comments on the post confirmed the bizarre thinking, except if I go back to my assertion that we are legalists by nature, then it makes sense. If you just tell me where the line is, then I will not cross it. I see it all as a self-defeating religious practice, much like the Pharisees.

And when the Pharisees saw this, they said to his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” (Matt 9:11).

Why indeed?

Having an understanding of decency and decorum is a good and honorable thing. We’ve lost that in our society. We’ve most likely lost it in the church, but there are ditches on both sides of the narrow path. Can’t we find a way to seek to honor the Lord without all the judgment and rule-making?

Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law? And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And the second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.” (Matt 22:36-39).

Do you want to be a good Christian? It always has been and always will be a religion of the heart, not outward appearances. Love God, love your neighbor, continue to seek the Lord’s will in your life and honor Him. Only Jesus gets to define those standards. If it’s clear in Scripture, then follow it. If not, you are free to make your own decisions.

Enjoy this 3:55 minutes of fun and thank the Lord you are not in a “church” like this one.

Kevin

Leaving Beaver

Posted on March 7, 2025 by kevinjandt

What should the cultural lens be for Christians? I’ve been thinking about this for a while now, and this concept has been stewing in my brain, especially since I noticed the desire among many Bible-believing Christians for a moral society.

Allow me to say that I also want a moral society and morality directed by the Scriptures is the best way to judge it. Without an objective standard, which the Bible provides, we are left only with opinions. Having strong opinions and convictions isn’t bad. It’s a good thing to know what you believe and why you believe it. No arguments from me on this one.

My concern is how we get there.

First, where are we?

Every generation thinks theirs is the worst. I doubt we are an exception. And if you want to look around, it’s hard to argue this is a moral society with a good moral compass guiding people and the youth of the day. But isn’t this always the case? Consider the times less than a hundred years ago. Whether it knew it or not, our country was coming out of a World War and would be headed toward another. A war sparked by one man’s desire to take over the world and destroy an entire ethnicity in his path. That doesn’t seem very good to me.

I have a lot of gripes and complaints against people and groups of people. I’m angry at the injustice in the world. I see and hear about a lot of things I don’t like. I hear about the abuse coming out of places that should care for and heal people. But instead, they are causing incredible damage. Most who know me or have read anything I put on paper know that I’m not a fan of the patriarchy movement. I think it is destructive to families, women, and the church. It is producing a lot of spiritual abuse.

While claiming high theological ground, this movement plays fast and loose with a concept never meant to apply to the family. The father/husband is not a God to the family (Think Gothard’s Umbrella of Authority). His job is to protect and love, not rule and lord over. Husband and wife are one flesh and are both heirs of the family of God. The individual priesthood of the believer is a real thing. Husbands should love and cherish their wives, not be served as a king.

I’ve seen a trend in patriarchs who long for the good old days. If only the wife stayed home, the kids would be home-schooled, and maybe all the women could return to wearing dresses and skirts. If you are in the position, get a homestead. Everything could go back to the days of June and Ward. We can begin moving things toward that ideal society one family at a time.

I’m not against some of these things, by the way. We live in a different time and place. Was the Leave It to Beaver generation better? How about earlier times? Where do we draw lines? It’s complicated, right? We can’t go back, and it’s unlikely datpostmil is being ushered in soon. This whole thing lacks the most essential issue of all—the Gospel.

Times change, people change, and cultures change, but Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Heb. 13:8). He is unchanging. If all of society collapses around us, what difference does it make if we are in Christ? I don’t like how things are, but I shouldn’t be too comfortable in this world. We are not meant for this world, so how hard should we work to change it?

What’s needed is balance. Live in the world, but don’t be too much in the world. Serve the Lord, love the church, serve people, and do the right things. Stand against what is wrong.

A friend sent me an article asking me to read it. A Catholic apologist is writing a response to the Gospel Coalition’s article on why Protestants are converting to Catholicism. According to the Coalition article, one reason is that “Protestants are too busy fighting secularism to focus on their own doctrinal distinctive.”

The orthodox wing of Protestantism is indeed busy fighting against secularism, but I think that’s a laughable reason they are turning to Catholicism. I’m not arguing for Catholicism, but there’s a lot of battling going on in Protestantism that has little to do with the gospel, and perhaps those converting to Catholicism are sick of it. Maybe they see it as a more stable system. They’ve had their issues, that’s for sure, but the abuse in our circles is being exposed at a much higher level than in the past, and I’m thankful for it.

The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill podcast opened the floodgates. The Sons of Patriarchy podcast shows just how bad things are in the loosely “Reformed” world. We also have books written by prominent scholars, such as Michael Kruger’s Bully Pulpit and Sinclair Ferguson’s The Whole Christ, only to name a couple.

Everyone is angling for a position of power, whether it’s the patriarch dominating his wife or some pastor trying to be an internet star. Going back to Beaver isn’t going to save the culture, the church, or souls. The whole patriarch movement is an overreaction to cultural Christianity, effeminate Christianity, or any other label you want to put on weak-kneed Christianity as they believe it to be. Sure, that’s out there, but I’m not sure this pendulum swing is healthier. I’d argue it’s worse.

He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the LORD require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God? Micah 6:8

Kevin

Wolves and Cowards

Posted on December 30, 2024December 31, 2024 by kevinjandt

It has been a couple of years since I last appeared on Apologetics Live to discuss Grace Fellowship Church (GFC). I was recently invited to discuss a sermon Tony Miano delivered in July 2022. I’ve written several articles about Tony (1) or some of Tony’s behaviors. (2). We were hopeful he would help reform Grace Fellowship. That not only didn’t happen, but Tony bought in entirely and changed the landscape even more. Perhaps, even making it worse than it was, although that’s not provable.

I’ve stated it before, and I’ll repeat it: I like Tony. We’ve had some great conversations; it is not my desire to malign, hurt, or attack him. I desire to wake him up and bring him to his senses. Perhaps he will listen to his words and realize he has bought in, hook, line, and sinker, with the exact type of church he warned against. (3).

I take no joy in writing about GFC or Tony. It’s not something I wring my hands about and say I can’t wait to write more. I wish they’d repent of their wickedness, clean up their act, or close their doors. But what have they done? More specifically, what has Tony done? He has played the victim card. While playing the victim card, he went on the offensive. He predicted in his sermon (4), someone would say something about it, and well, here I am. Fulfilling his wish to persecute him some more.

I’ve been referred to as the chief reviler, slanderer, and now wolf and coward. If we evaluate what Tony said there is a great deal of hypocrisy to uncover. I understand Tony doesn’t like the articles nor does the church he belongs, but there is a simple answer. Stop hurting people. The track record of spiritual abuse is long. It has gone on for a long time and there are a lot of witnesses that have testified to it. For them this is a problem. I didn’t invent this stuff out of thin air because I was bored and had nothing better to do with my life. We thought it was necessary to warn people. The Scripture says, love warns. Paul warns the elders in Ephesus to be on guard. Jesus says, beware of false prophets.

I have often wondered if Tony ever thinks about how many people he has abandoned? He has cut them out of his life for disagreeing with them as if they never existed. He’s disposed of some of those he would have called his best friends for no other reason than raising a red flag about Mike Reid. This has been very costly for him, but he has turned the tables and accused these people of leaving him on the field of battle. How clueless can he really be?

Tony’s resume. Tony claims this is not sharing this as some tacky attempt at self-promotion, but he does just that but in a humble-brag sort of way. He states this is a confession of sin that he has done evangelism wrong for all these years. But guess what? Now he has it figured out because he is finally under the authority of the right guys.

I’d be curious to know how Tony reconciles his claims that he was a member in good standing of the many churches he was a part of that had ordained and sent him out as an evangelist, but somehow this was bad because the ministry, “was mine,” as he so boldly proclaims. I can’t read Tony’s mind in his past 20 years on the streets. Perhaps, it is as he says. Perhaps, he primarily sought his own glory and not the glory of Christ, but the Scriptures also point out that no matter whether it was done out of selfish ambition, whether in pretense or in truth, Christ is proclaimed, and in that I rejoice, says Paul (Phil 1:15-18).

Was it all done perfectly? Doubtful. Is it done perfectly now? Also, doubtful. I believe the fallacy here is that somehow NOW that Tony is under the authority of Mike Reid and company, he is doing it much better than he did before. Well, of course, we’ve heard this many times from Tony. If you’ve ever watched his videos or heard audio of his open-air preaching, he usually begins with saying, “I’m here under the authority of my pastors and elders of so-and-so church.” We could go down through the years and see the many articles he has written in the past or statements made about doing this. Time and again it was now being done better. When he landed at Grace Community Church, he finally found the place to give him this long-desired spiritual covering. That didn’t last long. He quickly found this Utopian society in Davenport, Iowa.

Since we’ve heard this before, will it happen again? It’s not easy to escape Davenport, IA, I know. Tony appears to be bought in more than he has at these other places, and that is likely due to Mike Reid’s charismatic influences. I often wonder if Tony thinks about what has happened at the Church of Davenport since he arrived. Has he looked around and noticed how many people have left? How many of those that have left were excommunicated (5), for leaving? Has he noticed that many of those he called, “dear brother,” at one time or another and now he won’t even look at them if he sees them at Starbucks? Has he thought and pondered the suicide of a good friend (6), and the horrible treatment the family and friends received at that disgusting display of a “sermon” they preached? Has he thought about how many friends he has abandoned in that open-air community he deemed worthy of destruction? Has he considered that advisory board that he once trusted and now has zero communication with anyone of them, except perhaps one.

There’s an old saying that if the same thing keeps happening to you, perhaps it is you that are the problem. I think that applies to Tony’s situation and specifically to the Church of Davenport. Why is it that so many people have left and claimed spiritual abuse? Why has Mike Reid consistently been the target of these claims? Have all those that have left been in sin because they left? Or the old saying, where’s there’s smoke, there’s fire. The stories coming out of Grace Fellowship all have the common theme of authoritarianism and spiritual dominance. We experienced it. Our friends that left before and after us have experienced it.

Tony is an intelligent man; how does he not see it? He refers to us as wolves and cowards, but what does it mean to be a wolf, scripturally? The word appears only five times in the New Testament. Contextually, only two verses matter. Matthew 7:15 and Acts 20:29. To understand what a wolf is in the Bible, Matthew 7:15 is a good starting point. Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves. You will recognize them by their fruits.

Jesus says that wolves are first of all false prophets. They appear religious, and they appear to be pastoral, they are even in the office of one in religious authority. A pastor, an elder, maybe even a deacon or evangelist, but the thing Jesus says, is we need to beware of them.

Paul says about them to the Ephesian elders in Acts 20:29, Pay careful attention to yourselves and to all the flock, in which the Holy Spirit made you overseers, to care for the church of God, which he obtained with his own blood. I know that after my departure fierce wolves will come in among you, not sparing the flock. I included verse 28 to show that the context driving the understanding of a wolf is that they are in Christian service, primarily as an overseer. Verse 30 says, they will arise from within the ranks of Christianity.

How do we know who is a wolf? Jesus says you will know them by their fruits. What kind of fruit does a wolf produce? (7). What do wolves do in the wild? They devour sheep, for one. They scatter the flock according to Paul. They are carnivorous, so they bite and damage those in their care. They are wearing the clothing of sheep. If we were to examine the ministry of Mike Reid and compare it to what I have done since leaving I believe anyone with a degree of honesty would conclude that Mike Reid is the wolf, not me. Sadly, Tony, by association, is damaging the flock as well and he is doing it knowingly and willingly.

Tony spent considerable effort and time exposing false churches, authoritarian leaders and wolves before he came to Grace Fellowship. He did it with Bethel Redding and with the Church of Wells. We did a long podcast on that topic to show Tony, in his own words, how much GFC and Wells are alike. In the sermon discussed on this podcast Tony, in his own words, shows his forgetfulness.

The entirety of this podcast shows Tony’s hypocrisy and dare I say, cluelessness? Is he really this blind? Or is he under the sway of a charismatic leader that has bewitched him? You judge for yourself.

Here is a link (8) to the most devastating quote of the show. It is Tony in his own words speaking about something he is directly involved now, and the number one cheerleader for. But please listen to the entirety of the show and hear for yourself. And Happy New Year, may the Lord bring justice to the victims and trail of dead bodies behind the GFC bus.

Kevin

Have You Tried Forgiveness?

Posted on December 4, 2024 by kevinjandt

“Have you tried forgiveness?”

I wasn’t expecting that to come from the podcast I listened to. It seemed out of the blue, but there it was. I’ve become a fan of the Shawn Ryan Show, and Shawn asked his guest this question. The man was describing a challenging relationship with his father (Starting around the 52:00 minute mark). The father seemed to use the man for most of his life for his benefit. He always needed confirmation and kept score on the good things he’d done for his son. I’m sure it’s not uncommon.

In religious circles, it happens also. Religious leaders use people for their benefit. The stories are awful about the physical and sexual abuse that runs wild in certain religious circles. There is also the spiritual abuse that seems to be showing up everywhere. Podcasts, books, and blog articles have increased dramatically, seeking to expose the abuse. I’m grateful for those.

When Ryan asked this man about forgiveness, there was an awkward silence. He was thinking about it, but I’m guessing he was also thinking, “No way…. That’s the last thing I want to do.” Being a good host and wise man with experience, Ryan navigated the hesitation with a story about his hurt, and how the abuser sought forgiveness from Shawn. It was liberating, he said. “It was like a weight was removed. I’ll never speak to him again or want to be around him if I can help it, but I’m choosing to forgive.”

Forgiveness is the Christian message.

For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. Matthew 6:14

Forgiveness, or the other forms of the word, forgive, is used 129 times in the New Testament. Romans 4:7 says, Blessed are those whose lawless deeds are forgiven and whose sins are covered.

We all need forgiveness because we’ve all sinned against God, but we’ve also sinned against others. Others have also sinned against us. When we choose to forgive, we are not declaring everything is back to how it was. No, it’s a conscious decision to no longer allow bitterness and pain to rule over you.

I have forgiven those in my past who abused their religious authority over my life and the life of my family. I will, however, continue to expose their evil deeds. That is not an unbiblical thing to do. They have no power over me or my family’s life, and forgiveness is something I have willingly chosen to do so. I have also chosen to hold them accountable for their sins, especially since they continue to do those sins and hurt other people.

Forgiveness is necessary. Forgiveness is also liberating. It returns the power to you over those that have done damage. It is the better path to healing and restoration.

May we all seek peace, forgiveness, and uphold righteousness.

Kevin

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